ANOTHER GREAT HAS PASSED ON.

ANOTHER GREAT HAS PASSED ON.

When I was a kid, the first thing I ever wanted to be was a special effects artist like Dick Smith or Tom Savini. However, the timing was kind of rotten because by the time I had turned sixteen a little movie called “”The Abyss” had come out and shown that CGI could be a […]



Posted on June 16, 2008 by

BO DIDDLEY WILL BE MISSED

BO DIDDLEY WILL BE MISSED

I hate to follow a funny, jokey thread with such a gloomy one, but Bo Diddley died today at the age of 79. He was without question one of the greatest Rock N’ Rollers to ever walk the Earth. I easily consider him superior to guys like Chuck Berry and Little Richard. Yeah, they did their share of great […]



Posted on June 2, 2008 by

FROM THE “WHAT THE FUCK?” FILE…

FROM THE “WHAT THE FUCK?” FILE…

Sometimes I’ll be reading the news and come across something so utterly fucking retarded that it makes my blood come to an immediate boil. Get this, apparently Rachael Ray (Who’s Sicilian and not at all Muslim and/or a Terrorist as Wikipedia so kindly informs me.) has had her Dunkin Donuts ad pulled from TV because apparently […]



Posted on June 2, 2008 by

POSTAL

3 Stars
Year Released: 2007
MPAA Rating: R
Running Time: 95 minutes

“Postal” is so ballsy and unconcerned with playing touchy-feely that you have to admire the sheer joyful fearlessness that went in its making…


Posted on May 24, 2008 by

…AND SOMETIMES YOU BREAK EVEN.

…AND SOMETIMES YOU BREAK EVEN.

On May 6th “The Car” was re-released on DVD and even though it’s not as well made as other satanically themed 70′s films like “”The Exorcist” or “”The Omen” it does have something they don’t: Satan coming to Earth in the guise of a black two door coupe and terrorizing a small desert town in […]



Posted on May 13, 2008 by

THE SPEED RACER MOVIE DOESN’T MAKE MONEY, AND PEOPLE ARE SURPRISED?

THE SPEED RACER MOVIE DOESN’T MAKE MONEY, AND PEOPLE ARE SURPRISED?

Jesus, sometimes I think the studio people and investors are as retarded as some filmgoers. Did anyone REALLY think Speed Racer was going to make money? Anyone here? Anyone in Hollywood? Anyone in the WORLD?????? It’s an overly bright, noisy film that looks like it was edited by a masturbating chimp on meth. I’ve only seen […]



Posted on May 11, 2008 by

YOU WIN SOME, YOU LOSE SOME…

YOU WIN SOME, YOU LOSE SOME…

Film fans won a great victory on April 21st when Code Red DVD finally released one of the greatest horror movies of all time: “”Sole Survivor“. It was directed by Thom Eberhardt, who did the very cool “”Night of the Comet“, a teen horror comedy that shares nothing of the dark nihilistic Survivor except that […]



Posted on May 2, 2008 by

APRIL… FOOLS?

APRIL… FOOLS?

There’s something really wrong with the state of film when a gag trailer actually seems more promising than most real trailers. There is no “Legend of Zelda” movie on the way, but I’d be hard pressed to see how they could improve on this fake. Well… maybe slightly less hokey monsters and crap, but it’s still […]



Posted on April 4, 2008 by

HINTETY HINT HINT FOR AMY CRACKHOUSE’S MANAGER…

HINTETY HINT HINT FOR AMY CRACKHOUSE’S MANAGER…

Here’s an idea that hasn’t been tried:  Amy? Ammmmmmy? *whistle* Come on girl! Want a ride? Wanna go for a ride? Come on! Hop in the car. Your favorite squeaktoy is in there! Yes it is! Yes it is! Good girl! Your nose ish so wet! I mush your big slobbery face! Nawwwwwww, I’m not […]



Posted on March 27, 2008 by

THE DISTRICT! (DVD)

3 Stars
Year Released: 2007
MPAA Rating: Unrated
Running Time: 95 minutes

The best compliment I can give “The District” is that I was immediately reminded of the old “Flying Circus” animated sketches that Terry Gilliam directed…


Posted on March 15, 2008 by

RESIDENT EVIL JUST GOT PWNED

RESIDENT EVIL JUST GOT PWNED

I’m actually a fan of the Resident Evil movies. (I know, it’s a shock to me too.) They’ve never blown me away or anything, but they’re always good for a laugh on a rainy afternoon. However, this short film managed to entertain me more during it’s less than eight minute running time than all three of the Paul W.S. […]



Posted on March 4, 2008 by

“FRIDAY THE 13TH”: A SERIES RETROSPECTIVE (PART 3)

Since a new “Friday the 13th” film has been announced for production in April, and a release in theaters a year from now, Film Threat writer Jeremy Knox shares the sum total of everything he’s ever thought about the “Friday the 13th” films, in order…



Posted on February 29, 2008 by

“FRIDAY THE 13TH”: A SERIES RETROSPECTIVE

Since a new “Friday the 13th” film has been announced for production in April, and a release in theaters a year from now, Film Threat writer Jeremy Knox shares the sum total of everything he’s ever thought about the “Friday the 13th” films, in order…



Posted on February 29, 2008 by

“FRIDAY THE 13TH”: A SERIES RETROSPECTIVE (PART 2)

Since a new “Friday the 13th” film has been announced for production in April, and a release in theaters a year from now, Film Threat writer Jeremy Knox shares the sum total of everything he’s ever thought about the “Friday the 13th” films, in order…



Posted on February 29, 2008 by

FOR YOU ACTORS OUT THERE…

FOR YOU ACTORS OUT THERE…

Here’s a really good site I found on English dialects: International Dialects of English Archive. You got everything there from South African to Yorkshire accents, to the oral histories of 80+ year old Holocaust survivors. If you’ve been looking for something to teach you the various english accents of the world, you can do a whole […]



Posted on February 26, 2008 by

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