SOBER
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  Year Released: 2007 MPAA Rating: Unrated Running Time: 20 minutes |
WORLD PREMIERING AT THE GASPARILLA FILM FESTIVAL TONIGHT!!!…Regardless of how much innocence he claims, the methods of torture get more and more brutal. Thankfully, most of it isn’t shown, just implied, making the events all the more harsh to imagine…
Posted on February 27, 2009 by Michael Ferraro
10 MORE FILMS TO HELP YOU JUDGE A POTENTIAL SUITOR
FILM THREATS SEVEN DAYS OF VD!!! Were the first 10 not enough for you? Here are 10 more films to help you find that perfect someone…
Posted on February 13, 2009 by Michael Ferraro
TEN FILMS TO HELP YOU JUDGE A POTENTIAL SUITOR
FILM THREATS SEVEN DAYS OF VD!!! The dating scene can be real bummer. Especially when you think you finally found that perfect someone and all seems to be going great. Great, that is, until you find out they have the worst taste in movies ever.
Posted on February 10, 2009 by Michael Ferraro
PUSH
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  Year Released: 2009 MPAA Rating: PG-13 Running Time: 115 minutes |
It’s the kind of film you wish had no sound – perhaps the studio should have eliminated the dialogue and replaced it cue cards every few minutes like the silent films of old.
Posted on February 7, 2009 by Michael Ferraro
BRIDGE OF NAMES
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  Year Released: 2009 MPAA Rating: Unrated Running Time: 11 minutes |
The two characters strike a conversation about how their lives aren’t exactly where they want them to be. They are plagued with misery… just like those who watch.
Posted on February 4, 2009 by Michael Ferraro
PAUL BLART: MALL COP
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  Year Released: 2009 MPAA Rating: PG Running Time: 87 minutes |
Who out there is to gain any kind of entertainment value from watching “Paul Blart: Mall Cop”? Those millions of Americans who still find the ole’ fat-guy-running-into-clear-glass-window-and-then-falling-down routine hilarious.
Posted on January 18, 2009 by Michael Ferraro
THE UNBORN
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  Year Released: 2009 MPAA Rating: PG-13 Running Time: 87 minutes |
If only Goyer strived to make a comedy, perhaps all wouldn’t have been wasted.
Posted on January 13, 2009 by Michael Ferraro
BEDTIME STORIES
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Year Released: 2008 MPAA Rating: PG Running Time: 95 minutes |
I’ve seen better special effects in Troma releases – films with a smaller budget than the amount spent on this film’s catering.
Posted on January 6, 2009 by Michael Ferraro
TRANSPORTER 3
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Year Released: 2008 MPAA Rating: PG-13 Running Time: 100 minutes |
It’s hard to recommend to someone that they should shell out good coin to see this film in an actual theater…
Posted on November 28, 2008 by Michael Ferraro
DEFINITELY, MAYBE
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Year Released: 2008 MPAA Rating: PG-13 Running Time: 112 minutes |
It’s like “High Fidelity” (the wretched film, not the sweet novel) only without all that annoying talking-to-the-camera…
Posted on February 15, 2008 by Michael Ferraro
IN THE NAME OF THE KING: A DUNGEON SIEGE TALE
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  Year Released: 2007 MPAA Rating: PG-13 Running Time: 124 minutes |
Fans looking to ridicule and laugh at the newest Boll adventure will be disappointed after the first 20 minutes. It was funny when it started, then it got boring. Too boring to even laugh at anymore…
Posted on January 14, 2008 by Michael Ferraro
I AM LEGEND
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  Year Released: 2007 MPAA Rating: PG-13 Running Time: 101 minutes |
The creature effects are as basic as any Sci-Fi Channel movie, yet shots of the vacant city are some of the best of the year…
Posted on December 16, 2007 by Michael Ferraro
LILAH VANDENBURGH IS A “BITCH”
2007 AFI FILM FESTIVAL SHORT FILM! One lonely day, an envelope arrived with a slim black DVD case inside. Some sort of white-out like fluid covered the front side and spelled out, “BITCH! Written and Directed by Lilah Vandenburgh.” The rest is brilliant short film history…
Posted on November 8, 2007 by Michael Ferraro
SAW IV
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Year Released: 2007 MPAA Rating: R Running Time: 95 minutes |
“Saw IV” has more flashbacks than a homeless Vietnam vet on acid. Not just with Bell’s character but all throughout. There are even flashbacks to scenes that happened just a few minutes prior…
Posted on October 29, 2007 by Michael Ferraro
PARK
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Year Released: 2006 MPAA Rating: Unrated Running Time: 86 minutes |
IN LIMITED RELEASE! It’s a hilarious, crowd-pleasing film about everything from honesty to sex to freedom that’s definitely smart without being too overbearing. The title, referring both to the location and what each character is actually doing, couldn’t have been more apt…
Posted on October 28, 2007 by Michael Ferraro