I recently watched a pair of new DVD releases featuring glamour gals of yesteryear: Jayne Mansfield in “Promises! Promises!” and Mamie Van Doren in “Three Nuts in Search of a Bolt.” And you know something — they had the best breasts in movie. But, of course, Jane Russell was the Queen of Tits and Raquel Welch is still my favorite wet dream subject. Which leads me to ask: where have all the big-breasted women gone? At least on the big screen? Who are the reigning mammary mamas in movies? Am I stuck in the past, or have the ladies with big boobies disappeared from the contemporary cinema?

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Yes, I finally did it! I replaced my Lost Boys soundtrack! Talk about a blast from the past, ever since Eric, Pete, Don and I were talking about the film at SXSW, I’ve been jones’ing to get my hands on the damn CD again. Well, I did and it’s loaded onto the iPod and life is fruity.

And I dedicate the following image to Eric Campos:

Ah, the gyrations of Timmy Capello, the real lasting image from the movie (seriously, who doesn’t think of this guy when you recall the film)…

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Wednesday night, there was a late night festival party at a place called Cafe Cairo, where I met up with Sam Dunn and Scot McFadyen (co-directors of Metal: A Headbanger’s Journey). We shared responsibilities of buying drinks for a little while and spoke of metal’s glory days. It was a great conversation that amped me their screening on Thursday.

Then Thursday rolled around and I packed myself in The Little Theater with a room full of people to watch the film. From opening to closing, it’s an utterly brilliant and captivation journey through the world of metal (with all of it’s subgenres). When I was a young teen, I used to listen to some grindcore (bands like Spazz, Napalm Death, Charles Bronson, Fuck on the Beach, Asshole Parade, etc.) like it was noone’s business. I used to love it. And this film brings up this little subgenre but doesn’t quite explore it, which is cool because this music was never really that important anyway. It was to me way back when, but in the world of music and metal, it has never blown up like the other genres had.

Both I and the crowd loved this film equally. They told me about their experience at SXSW, which apparently was a huge success there too. During the Q and A after the film, they assured us that the DVD will be released in the states in May, with a bonus feature containing a 40 minute extra doc on Norway’s brutal Black Metal.

Can’t wait. They also hinted at following this film up with even more metal history, covering topics like race, gender, and other such subjects. I admire their dedication to the music and to filmmaking. I anxiously await their next project.

Keep em fucking coming guys.

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Last night, I took a boat ride with about 15 other festival attendees to an island where a super nice house waited for us, with dinner and drinks. After a few drinks, dinner started and at a very large dining room table, where I sat with Peter Riegert (he actually sat right across from me). Also at the table was director Annie Griffin (Festival), director Steven Lewis Simpson (Retribution) and a cast of others.

The conversation was interesting but at one point, I made mention to a “character actor” and Riegert then asks me, “Aren’t all actors playing a character?” True that (double true), and for a brief second I felt a tad stupid, but what can you. Yes, all actors are playing characters but only a select few are character actors. To me, what earns you that title, is the ability to stand against type casting, by playing roles that are totally different than one prior. But that’s just me.

The Bermuda International Film Festival has been a great ride so far. I have met so many cool people as the environment is much more personal, unlike, say Sundance. Everyone here as been great and I look forward to my last 4 days here.

Took some time away from the cinema today to do some sight-seeing. Dean, an amazing driver for the festival, took me a few other guys around the entire island almost. We saw beautiful houses owned by rich people (even a house that cost 45 million dollars).

Here is me on a beach somewhere in Bermuda. It may look a bit odd, as I am not sure the proper setting of the height and width (Mark, can you help me out with that?).

When the festival is over and I am back in the states, look out for my closing piece on the festival that will have a lot more exciting pictures than that.

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Monday was a big day for the BIFF. First, I caught a screening of ZoZo, directed by Josef Fares, which details the life of a boy moving from a war-torn Lebanon to Sweden. The day before, I caught screenings for the upcoming Asian horror flick, Ghost of Mae Nak, and the Scottish comedy about a group of actors trying to perform during the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, called Festival.

But Back to Monday… at 6:30pm, there was a screening for the underrated and underappreciated Joel Schumaker film, Falling Down, starring Michael Douglas. Douglas showed up after the film (which was great to see on the big screen finally, as I missed its original run) and did a Q and A, moderated by David Poland, which was utterly brilliant.

After it was over, we all headed back to headquarters where drinks and food and more drinks waited for us. Michael Douglas headed there too, which was cool, and I got to chat with him a bit. Also at the party was actor Peter Riegert, who played Boon in Animal House, one of the jurors of the festival.

Now, if you’ve read my prior blogs during this festival, you may have noticed my love for The Shield. It’s my favorite television show (yes, over The Sopranos) and I will actually be missing the 90 minute season finale today, since I am in Bermuda. But, I am taping it, so all is well. A little while after seeing Michael Douglas and Peter Riegert, another jury member came my direction and started conversing with me and the group I was with. Her name was Laura Elena Harring, who plays Vic Mackey’s lawyer on The Shield, Becca Doyle.

How great was this. She is a wonderful person; we spoke of the show (which she is very hush hush about plot wise) in great detail, as far as production goes. It was a great way to end a truly great evening.

Keep an eye peeled for some more reviews and when I get back to the States, prepare yourself for some sweet pictures.

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I’m still here in Austin! Someone come get me! Just kidding, I leave tomorrow and have a Wednesday appointment for a liver transplant. This years fest was even better than the last 2 and Matt Dentler deserves props for that as do all his staff. SXSW is simply the greatest film festival going today. They do it right by kicking back and letting people have fun and see movies. It’s the anti-Sundance.

This week, as you may have seen from some of my reviews, I saw PUNK LIKE ME (boo!), THE CASSIDY KIDS (yay!!) and Gretchen (yay!). I also some some sweeeeet sneak previews including A SCANNER DARKLY, A PRARIE HOME COMPANION and AMERICAN DREAMZ. All three are GREAT so keep an eye out for reviews. I also saw another sneak peak and had a shitty experience for the first time ever at SXSW. Here’s what happened…

Last night there was a Midnight screening of SLITHER at The amazing Alamo Drafthouse. I had another screening right before it so I made arrangements with the awesome SXSW volunteer staff to make sure I could get in. I then made arrangements for some friends to hold me a seat in the back of the Drafthouse. I got in the door no problem and quickly located my friends. I sat down on a couch marked “Press” and settled in for some beers and midnight horror. I got the latter right quick.

Some stooge from UNIVERSAL comes over and tells me I can’t sit there, it’s reserved. I quickly pointed to my badge and said, “yeah, reserved for press….I’m press.” This sycophant douche bag says, “yeah. But these are reserved for some UNIVERSAL execs coming in.” It had been a long week and I didn’t feel like being trifled with…so I turned into a dick. I told the guy that it’s totally unprofessional to move a member of the press from the press area and that he should know better. I then said, “you know Film Threat is an internet outlet and James Gunn is a friend of ours and that this is total bullshit and furthermore, this isn’t going to settle well.” To that the guy blew me off and rushed over to blow…err…seat the exec who had just came in. Left in the cold by UNIVERSAL I literally found the last seat in the packed house. By the way, and this has nothing to do with UNIVERSAL being unprofessional dicks….the movie pretty much blows. Look for my review soon.

Tonight UNIVERSAL nearly outdid themselves by not allowing any camera phones into AMERICAN DREAMZ. My camera has a phone and I came clean after the anouncement and the oh-so-helpful UNIVERSAL people said that I had to put the phone in my car or room. I said “the movie starts in 20 minutes and my hotel is a 30 minute walk there and back.” The guy said, “I don’t know what to tell you.” I said, “I’m just basically screwed then?” He said something to the effect of “I wouldn’t say that, but you can’t come in with the camera phone.” Way to help out the press trying to do their job UNIVERSAL. And even more annoying….why the fuck can you not bring a camera PHONE into a theater?? What, am I going to record the film in 20 second takes and re-edit it for distribution? Am I going to take snapshots of the screen or something? Stupid people. Understand the technology before you screw people over. I ended up leaving my phone in some nice persons car.

Other than UNIVERSAL being unhelpful, irritating and unprofessional I’ve had a blast! Can’t wait for next year!!

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Ahoy there! Now I write to you fine readers from the glorious land of Bermuda.

Last night, the festival kicked off with Paul Weitz’ American Dreamz, which attempted to be a witty satire but was more of a stupid slapstick film. Disappointing to say the least. After the film, I headed back to festival headquarters with fellow journalist Jack Pattilo (of Ain’t it Cool News fame) and we partied like rockstars. Many locals have told me that if there is one thing I try here in Bermuda, make it a Dark and Stormy, which is some sort of alcoholic beverage, so I did. And 5 drinks later, it was 12:30am, and I sadly missed the midnight screening of Ghost of Mae Nak, a film by Mark Duffield, but since Mark is here, I plan on tracking him down to see if I can get a screener.

Today, I finally got a chance to see Park Chan Wook’s Sympathy for Lady Vengeance. It more than made up for both his contribution to Three… Extremes and for the screening of Dreamz last night. Park is quickly becoming my favorite living director, so I hope he keeps up the good work.

When I arrived, a fellow named Stu picked me up from the airport and gave me a tour of the island. Bermuda is about 25 miles long, and the speed limits don’t exceed 30mph, but it’s very beautiful nonetheless. All over the island, hundreds of people get around by driving scooters. I was actually thinking about renting one at one point but after seeing how they drive, I think I am going to pass. When there is a traffic jam (with cars that is), most of these little motorists just drive right by them, ignoring the traffic. Every time you open a car door, you have to be on the look out for these brave motorist because you might accidentally clip one. It’s crazy.

I am now off to grab a bite to eat. Tonight I will be screening Lumet’s new film (which I am more than excited about) Find me Guilty and an indie called Festival. Look out for some reviews this coming week and keep your eye out for more blogging action.

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So, I am going to Bermuda tomorrow to cover the Bermuda International Film Festival. I am more than excited (as I will be travelling to a new land I have yet to visit and I will be hittin’ up the festival scene) but I have yet to prepare myself for the journey.

I haven’t packed one single thing yet. Guess I have a busy night ahead of me…

As far as their lineup is concerned, they have some goods. The thing I am most excited about is Park’s Lady Vengeance. It’s playing this Saturday, so look for a review coming soon. Also, there is a screening of Shumaker’s Falling Down with a special Q and A with Michael Douglas afterwards. Now, I like that film, but of all the Michael Douglas movies to have a Q and A for, they picked that one? Ah well, I am still excited. Remind me to thank Don Lewis for this exciting opportunity (thanks Don)… I am going to be one festival’d mo-fo these next two weeks. Bermuda this week coming, then I dive into the Florida Film Festival the minute I get back for another week of fun. The only real problem I face is that I am going to miss the season finale of The Shield; all of its 90-minute glory. It’s being tapped though, thanks the wacky inventor of the DVR. Look out for upcoming blogs on my adventures in Bermuda. Should be a good time. See you in the sun.

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Eric, Jam editor Dennis Przywara and myself got to see Darkon this afternoon at the Alamo Drafthouse. Number one, the Drafthouse is the best theater in the world. I had beer and a cheesesteak, life was good. Number two, Darkon was a blast. Number three, when the filmmakers were giving away free Darkon swords, I and Eric got one. Pictures to come later.

Eric and I may’ve had a lot of beer after the fact as well…

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Hey all you blog reading blogophiles out there! Sorry for the lack of blogging by my lazy blogging ass. Between parties, movies and trying to remember to eat and sleep, blogging has been kind of far off the main objectives. Anyway…

Last night I saw THE CASSIDY KIDS at the Paramount and it was one of the coolest film experiences of my life. The film is awesome, first off. I’ll let you all read my review which should be up shortly. What made it an amazing screening was I finally saw first hand this much talked about “Austin Film Community.” Sure, University of Texas has an outstanding film program. Yeah, Robert Rodriguez, John Pierson and Richard Linklater call Austin home and yeah, alot of people here love film. But last nights screening was so communal and fun, I got goose bumps.

THE CASSIDY KIDS was produced by “Burnt Orange Productions” which, to the best of my knowledge, is basically the students of UT working as crew on the film. So when director Jacob Vaughan and producer Bryan Poyser were introduced, they were greeted like celebrities. Heck, for that matter, festival producer Matt Dentler gets a nice little ovation whenever he steps up. But here’s the difference, in Austin, they really like these people and want to support them and I really felt that at the screening last night.

Every person from Austin who was mentioned as a major contributor (producers, editors, sound) got a rousing round of applause. Then, as the opening credits rolled, it seemed like every person was known by a large section of the crowd. More cheering. Then the film started and everyone was locked in for the ride. Afterwards there was a long standing ovation and one of the questions during the Q&A was to have everyone who worked on the film stand up. Nearly 1/4 of the audience rose and received more applause. It was just plain…neat. Even the films stars Kadeem Hardison and Judah Friedlander had to mention what a great experience working here was for them. They said everyone was happy to be there working on the film even though it was 100 degrees in deadly August Texas heat.

At other festivals it’s all about celebrity seeking and wanna-be posturing. Yeah, I’m looking at you Sundance. But here at SXSW, people just want to see great films, have some fun and support independent filmmaking. It’s that vibe that makes this such a great city and bar none the BEST film festival going today. So good on ya, Austin!! Keep it up! You guys are how filmmaking and festival going should be!

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