His name is probably not familiar to you, but if you are a Voodoo Rhythm Records junkie like myself, you know the Germany-based M.A. Littler as the man who did the documentary “Voodoo Rhythm: The Gospel of Primitive Rock ‘N’ Roll” (now available on DVD). Voodoo Rhythm Records is such a niche label in this country that I had to find out more about the man who made the film. I went into the interview assuming he was a fiend for the music, again much like myself. I was not disappointed.

The very first thing I asked the filmmaker was what inspired him to make his movie. After all, the label isn’t Island Records or even Epitaph. Not nearly enough people have heard of it.

“I went to my local club in Frankfurt and heard the ‘Day of the Dead’ album by the Dead Brothers,” Littler says of the Voodoo Rhythm Records band. “That album immediately struck a chord with me. Those guys did whatever they wanted; they blended old time blues, punk, Cajun, gypsy music and funeral tunes. I had just done a film about the biker scene in Florida, and I needed something totally different, so the idea of making a film about the Dead Brothers began to grow inside my head like a tumor.” Like a lot of tumors, things quickly grew out of control.

“While researching the band I discovered their record label Voodoo Rhythm,” Littler continues. “I was impressed that the label, just like the band, didn’t stick to any musical formula.

The label itself puts out all these musical styles that on paper don’t fit — blues, punk, scum country, Cajun, Zydeco, garage, etc.. I also came across a picture of this crazed primitive rock ‘n’ roll preacher. As it turned out it was a picture of Reverend Beat-Man [the guru behind the label]. The next thing, I called him up thinking I had to convince him that I was legit and I told him about everything I had done. He didn’t give a shit, he just said come on down . . . so I did. I like to say: ‘I got voodooed!’”

The bands Littler interviewed for his film seemed to have none of the usual pretensions that come with many bands that are doing things outside the norm. I wondered if this was actually the case (or the product of generous editing) and wanted to know how these folks reacted to being interviewed.

“I was worried about them being self conscious or skeptical,” Littler admits, “especially since [we] had never met. I decided to have a few drinks prior to every interview, and we soon realized that we were kindred spirits. So common interests and the holy spirit broke down any potential barriers. The bands are all down to earth folk; there’s absolutely no pretension there whatsoever. I’m often asked what Beat-Man is like off stage, and my answer is simple: He’s a primitive in the most positive sense of the word. He’s a rooted man, rooted in his community and family … perhaps with a slightly compulsive taste for chicken and crazed out primitive rock ‘n’ roll. He’s a diamond in the rough.”

When I reviewed the film, I commented that the downside of the movie was that it would isolate anyone who wasn’t into the music being covered. It’s so stylized that today’s ears, which have been feasting on bubblegum pop for far too long, might not appreciate the honesty and originality that these bands offer. Littler disagreed with my assessment and let me know it.

“The film is not merely about music. It’s the portrait of a way of life that stands in contrast to an over-processed culture in which music and most lives have become standardized. The bands on the label are outlaws; they don’t need record deals and fancy advertising. They need to scream, cry, holler and rage, and they don’t give a shit what’s hip and what’s not. They do things their way, and I think that transgresses all musical tastes. The film was really successful in Europe, and it was mostly middle aged folks that came to me and said, ‘How the hell are we supposed to go back to work in the morning after seeing this film?’ They started to question their middle of the road existence. Most of these people had no idea about primitive rock ‘n’ roll and yet the reacted to the characters in the film.”

That point is well taken, so I asked if he thought more bands of the type seen on Voodoo would be popping up based on the success of the film. After all, imitation is rampant in the music world, and anything that seems even remotely viable gets cloned.

“I see bands riding the VR wave,” Littler admits, “but you gotta feel it. It’s gotta be real and not following a hype. Beat-Man turns down a lot of bands that on paper fit the VR profile. If he doesn’t see that it’s heartfelt and the genuine article, he’ll pass on them. It’s all about integrity.”

Integrity is important to any and all art. So is innovation and creation. Littler isn’t resting on his laurels, either. In fact, the Dead Brothers documentary, the idea of which led to the Voodoo Rhythm documentary, is currently in theatres. And there’s more where that came from.

“A documentary about the photographer, filmmaker and crime novelist Miron Zownir will be out in January,” Littler tells me. “He’s a fascinating and volatile character. He documents outlaws, misfits and other creatures that live on the outer fringes of our civilization. The big one next year will be “The Road to Nod,” a film noir style road movie, which we shot in September. That ought to hit cinemas around April 2007. We also make a lot of music videos. Check out www.slowboatfilms.com to keep updated. I visit the site myself to remind me what I’m about to do next.”

One thing is certain: If Littler puts the kind of love into his other films that he put into the Voodoo Rhythm documentary, they will all be worth watching. I know I’ll be looking for the Miron Zownir film. In fact, I’ll be looking at all the films Littler makes in his life. Anyone who’s done the work he has in order to expose the world to Voodoo deserves my undying attention and respect. Now get to your altars and pay your dues. Littler’s got a little magic waiting for you.

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2006 was surely a year of bad filmmaking, and while there were definitely bright spots, there were more theaters filled with garbage than there were films worth watching. While 2007 is looking up as a year for genre fans, we’ll likely see more cash grabs and pure pieces of feces polluting theaters than films we can remember. Since January is quickly on the way, I picked some of the upcoming film releases I’m most excited to see while juxtaposing films I’m hoping are quickly forgotten by theater-goers. This is just the tip of the iceberg in the theatrical releases, yes, but hopefully this will be a better year than the one that brought us “Little Man,” “The Wicker Man,” “Black Christmas,” “The Quiet,” and “The Covenant.”

“Is there a place in the head, when shot that can make it explode?” Butterman asks a befuddled Angel in the utterly anticipated “Hot Fuzz.” I’ve set my movie calendar around the upcoming release of this cop comedy from the same folks that brought us the masterpiece “Shaun of the Dead,” one of the funniest creepiest zombie films made in years, and if that’s not enough reason to watch this, I can just give you one word: “Spaced.” Period. Way to sell those action scenes, Pegg. There’s also “Reno911: Miami” which is an expected adaptation of the hilarious show that’s part “Police Academy” part “COPS.” Out of all of the films next year, though, I’m hoping audiences flock to “The Host” and discover this monster movie masterpiece. It’s essentially a very intelligent take on the genre, with a straight faced story of a monster wreaking havoc on Korea.

The monster is only a small part in an epic story about government corruption, germ warfare, and family. It has to be seen. Being such a fan of “28 Days Later,” I displayed much antipathy and pure anger at the upcoming “28 Weeks Later,” but after viewing clips of the production, I’m open to the possibility that this could be the “Aliens” to Boyle’s “Alien.” The upcoming “Grindhouse” which has become one of the few films I’m setting everything aside to see, is a film I’m weary of these days thanks in part to Tarantino, for reasons I can’t divulge. “Grindhouse” is a film I’m very excited to watch only for the entertaining fake trailers, the guarantee we’ll see two full length films in one showing, Rodriguez giving us a zombie film filled with a great cast, incredible action, and Rose McGowan with a cock machine gun, and the possibility studios will begin to mimic this concept if pulled off successfully.

Roriguez is not a brilliant director but he knows how to give us a damn good horror film. I personally enjoyed “Land of the Dead,” even though I’ve come across many who didn’t. Granted, it doesn’t hold up well on repeated viewings, but it’s still a tight and entertaining bit of zombie carnage I hope Romero can improve on with “Diary of the Dead,” yet another entry into the “Dead” series this time focusing on a group of people making a movie in the woods who find themselves in the middle of the zombie apocalypse. It’s very disappointing Romero didn’t elaborate on the characters from “Land,” but he’s very confident about this entry into the series, and I have high hopes. “Fido” is another zombie entry I’m anxious to watch only because the possibilities are endless. Set in an alternate world in the fifties, after a zombie apocalypse of their very own, a Canadian suburb is able to control the population of zombies. With special collars, they control the walking dead using them as pets and servants. But when Fido’s (Billy Connolly) collar breaks, there’s… some gore to be had.

Last year there was “Hard Candy,” and now there’s “Leslie Vernon,” a film I’m very anxious to see and hope to catch on its limited theatrical release. Reports from the horror front have confirmed it to be an excellent genre entry about a serial killer in the vein of Jason Voorhes. As a hardcore Beatles fan, “Across the Universe” is an intriguing premise, even if it’s not all original. A musical set to Beatles music. It’s been done, I’ll give you that, but it’s the Beatles. Case closed. And who can forget “Spider-Man 3″ yet another film about the web crawler which now features the symbiote suit, Parker whining, the Sandman, Parker whining, Topher Grace as Eddie Brock, Parker whining, Bryce Dallas Howard, Parker whining, and Venom! As was the case with “Sin City,” the new Frank Miller adaptation “300″ looks to bring audiences an exciting action picture about the Spartans and sword and sandals excitement to a film world void of it, and I’m admittedly welcoming this with open arms.

“I’ve gotten offers to do things and I always say no. Maybe if there was a certain movie where I felt like the original idea was great but the movie was bad, but I don’t understand remaking great films. It’s not that they’re bad movies. Maybe they’re better for a new wave of kids who haven’t seen the original. I just don’t understand the reason behind remaking a great film.” Yes, that was a quote from Rob Zombie, and 2007 brings us Rob Zombie’s “Halloween,” a remake that continues to pull me in all directions. On the one hand, Zombie did bring flair to “The Devil’s Rejects,” and it’s rumored Danielle Harris will play a big role in the remake, yet we have Malcolm McDowell as Loomis, which will be the first time we’ll see Loomis frighten audiences more than Michael; and if Zombie completely botches this, he’ll be deemed a martyr with the blame of the failure being pitted on the studios and studios alone. “They interferred. They didn’t let him give his vision.” He just can’t lose with this.

And then there’s “Transformers,” which will include giant robots that can turn into cars, large explosions, a massive war, and I’ll bet Michael Bay still fucks it up. In the too little, too late category there’s “The Simpsons Movie,” an adaptation of the long running show which begs the question: Can a show that stopped being funny years ago warrant a funny movie? As a hardcore fan of the series, this upcoming film would have excited me, but have you seen the show lately? Then there’s “Underdog,” which features a computer generated dog flying around and saving people, and boy what a masterpiece it will be. Especially since the original animated series wasn’t entertaining to begin with. Hated “Fantastic Four”? Everyone with taste did, but director Story is hoping to undercut any lack of interest by bringing in one of the better Marvel characters as a centerpiece. Silver Surfer appears, to take on the foursome in what will surely be a poorly told story with the requisite horrible computer effects.

Speaking of horrible effects, Nu Image brings us the wholly unnecessary remake “Day of the Dead,” which strips away the gore, carnage, thought provoking story, characterization, low-key pacing, and Bub to replace it with bad acting, zombies who can growl and leap like cheetahs, a zombie character named Bud, vegetable eating zombies, and a completely missed franchise opportunity as a separate entry from 2004’s “Dawn of the Dead.” How can we look forward to a movie being made by the same folks who were behind “Day of the Dead: Contagium”? If you saw “Day of the Dead: Contagium” you already know the answer to that. In the category of horrible remakes we have the utterly lame brained “The Hitcher,” which is slowly becoming an obvious botched job that takes the original story and… adds a woman this time. Genius. While Sean Bean is always great for the psycho role, this remake looks exactly the same as its predecessor.

Which I assumed the studios were trying to pull away from with their terms “re-imagining.” And in sequels there’s “White Noise 2,” which is basically “Final Destination” a la “The Purple Tesament.” While I’m a big fan of Nathan Fillion whose work in one of my favorite shows of all time can not go unnoticed, this is one of those typical sequels that don’t deserve to be made. And then there’s “Hostel II.” My favorite punching bag Eli Roth now casts women (genius!) in this sequel to the xenophobic franchise that finds a group of college girls being tortured and not much else. Anyone who knows me knows I despise Eli Roth and everything he’s involved in.

While “Hostel” was just sub-par, “Hostel II” is (not surprisingly) not a step up creatively. “Hostel” now with women! Brilliance. Paul WS Anderson continues torturing us first with the nut stomping of the utterly disappointing “Alien vs. Predator,” and now brings us the sequel which is rumored to have both monsters throwing down in a supermarket. Will Smith pops up for the horror movie “I Am Legend” which is possibly the most disappointing casting news in years considering “I Am Legend” is filled with endless possibilities, yet we’ll surely be subjected to endless one-liners from Smith, super model vampires, and his usual sly charm in the face of flesh eating ghouls.

For all the people who utterly loved Jayma Mays as Charlie in “Heroes,” you will be disappointed to see her headlining the upcoming “Epic Movie,” yet another spin on the “Scary Movie” franchise. “Date Movie” was unspeakably bad and I foresee doom with this spoof of blockbusters that references “Cribs” and “Lord of the Rings.” But I’ll take “Epic Movie” over the “Bratz” movie any day. “Bratz” one of the many contributors to the decline in intelligence and values in America’s youth turning them into “Laguna Beach” clones, now brings us an upcoming live action movie which will surely be a film with complex and honest insight into today’s youth. In the history of films that should have never been made, this will be king.

What horrors and treasures will 2007 bring to film geeks? We shall see. I’m excited. My nipples are hard.

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Recently my friends have been taking me to task whenever I use my column to rip on movies I haven’t seen. Now, if I haven’t seen a film, I don’t say I have, but that’s apparently a moot point. And it doesn’t matter that they routinely confuse a critical piece, where I have to see the movie in order to write the review, with an opinion piece, where anything is fair game. It seems that some of my friends (and casual acquaintances) would like me to stop picking on movies like “Snow Dogs” and “Miami Vice” because I haven’t subjected myself to their tortures. “It’s only fair,” they say, “to see the movie before you make fun of it.”

A bullet from a .45, which weighs a mere 230 grams, is capable of doing a lot of damage to the human body. Once inside the victim, many different factors come into play. If the bullet hits bone, it can either shatter the bone or ricochet off it (sometimes both happen), causing it to exit where one would least expect. (In smaller caliber guns, it has been noted that men trying to kill themselves with a shot to the head are sometimes surprised that a bullet that goes through the roof of the mouth may come out an eye or even travel along the surface of the skull and miss the brain entirely.) Bullets also don’t retain their shape. Some mushroom. Some splinter. Hollow points are designed to actually get trapped inside the body (and are often used so that people behind the intended target don’t get hit by an exiting bullet). If a hollow point .45 bullet leaves the victim, as rare as that is, its exit wound is significantly larger than its entrance wound. This means that while wounds may have some universal patterns, one constant is inconsistency.

.45 caliber bullets have killed. They have paralyzed. They have even gone through lucky souls without hitting any major organs, leaving an exit wound as clean as the entrance wound. “Clean” isn’t exactly the proper word, though. As these bullets enter the body, they tear flesh, which leaves a wound ripe for all sorts of nasty bacteria. And if these bullets happen to tear an intestine on their route, fecal matter can complicate the healing process.

I know all of this through research. I’ve read up on the subject, and I’ve seen real-life footage of people who have been shot. I’ve examined autopsy photos, and have listened to experts drone on and on about the subject. I have never been shot with a .45 bullet.

That said, I know enough about it to realize I really don’t want to be.

When I bust on “Radio” or “Happy Feet,” it’s the same thing. I know enough about the film to be able to take it to task. It’s not judging a book by its cover, either. It’s judging by common sense, reading reviews, watching trailers and listening to what other people have to say about it. It’s the same exact process normal people use when deciding what movie they want to see. I just use it to tell me which ones I don’t want to watch. (Other people do the same thing, but apparently don’t realize it.)

I’ve been involved in “entertainment journalism” long enough to know when something makes for good comedy. I won’t write a review of the skewered film (unless I have seen it), but that doesn’t mean I can’t and won’t comment on it. Like it or not, I’m going to speak my mind about crap like “Snakes on a Plane,” and there’s nothing that can stop me. And while that may irritate some readers and friends, I must say I don’t care.

The role of a critic is closely tied to the role of a commentator. There is a subtle difference, however. A critic usually focuses on one set piece of work, or body of work. A commentator can be broader in scope. I don’t know why some people don’t get this. It’s really not my problem, though. My problem is coming up with new and clever ways of belittling people who paid to see “Fantastic Four.” (I can’t call them “socially retarded wannabe pedophiles” because some people take that the wrong way, and it paints real pedophiles in a bad light.) My problem is not making sure I don’t offend a “Star Trek” fan. My problem is making sure I do.

I’m glad people defend film. That’s important. If more people did it, maybe there would be no need for the MPAA or directors’ versions (because that’s what we’d see in the first place). Instead of fighting for those things, though, people want to tell me to stop “dissing” “Lord of War.” In a country where you’re still pretty free to say almost anything, this is what they chose to speak about. I have a problem with that. Sure, defend film, but at least pick something worth defending. Something with some actual guts. Something of substance.

When people defend films as “mindless fun,” I’ll attack that. Some are mindless fun. (“The Corpse Grinders” comes to mind.) But when people call them “mindless fun” and then act as if these movies have some honest-to-God relevance to the world of cinema, I will definitely call that as I see it, even if I haven’t watched the film. Let’s face it, in twenty years from now nobody is going to be calling “Urban Legend” a horror masterpiece. To defend it as such is to declare your ignorance of film both past and present. Yet it happens all the time. People get so caught up in the moment, fed a steady diet of nothing, that they can’t identify films of true importance. To them, a classic film is what came out last summer. It’s the girl on myspace.com who is twenty-five and declares “Legally Blonde” to be her favorite movie of “forever” because it really taught her “what’s important in life.” It’s someone saying they had low expectations for a film before they even saw it, but went anyway “just because.”

And I’m the one who gets shit for saying “The Dukes of Hazard” looked like a poorly planned execution that went horribly wrong. Where’s the justice in that?

Here’s my challenge to the people who say I shouldn’t poke fun at a movie I haven’t seen: If you stop seeing crap, I’ll stop telling you it looks like crap. If you start watching films of actual merit, are able to discuss them in terms other than “really good,” “cool” and “the special effects rocked,” I’ll stop “dissing” remakes and “reimagings.” If you stop going into films with “zero expectations” and start watching films you think are actually worth your time and money, I’ll stop pointing out what a tool you are. If you stop going to see nonsense because “there was nothing better to do,” I’ll stop reminding you that with all the entertainment choices in the world there is no longer any excuse to be bored.
It’s a tall order. I understand that. But I’m willing to hold up my end of the bargain. I can write plenty of columns about movies I enjoy. The thing is, I don’t think you folks can hold up your end. Your sweet tooth dictates far too many of your viewing choices. Seeing garbage is so ingrained into your psyche that quality films no longer look good. In fact, I think you’d rent a film you’ve seen before — and disliked — just because it’s on the new shelf instead of trying something that is actually new to you.

I’ve got your number, and I don’t even know some of you all that well. I guess I’m guilty again. Maybe it would be harder if you weren’t so damn predictable. Think about that the next time you sit down to write me a letter about how “wrong” I am to dismiss something like “The Departed” without even seeing it. Think about that, and then think about my little piece on the .45 bullet and to what I wrote about guys shooting themselves in the head. If you don’t believe me about exit wounds, give it a try. Just don’t put the gun in your mouth. I don’t want to take the chance that the bullet would miss your brain.

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Just a note, as of November 24th, I’ve officially been on Film Threat for a year. Break out the alcohol free Wine, folks.

And it’s been a fulfilling time stuffed with new compadrès earned (you know who you are), new challenges accomplished, and a shit load of movies I’ve yet to finish. And I love it. Corny, right?

On that time I’ve thought, if I could have one wish throughout my tenure here, whether through accident, or circumstance, if I could have one wish, it’d be to interview Richard Linklater. It’s a bit selfish to test my luck in that regard, only because you’re only granted so many wishes in life before the well runs dry, but I mean it, if I could, I’d pick that man’s brain for at least an hour.

There are only a few directors in Hollywood right now who can release a film and keep me waiting on the edge of my seat for it to be released, and there are few directors who can demand enough interest to seek their films out relentlessly.

It’s not just because of the company he keeps (Rory Cochrane, Adam Goldberg, Nicky Katt, Ethan Hawke), it’s because the man’s writing is utterly fantastic. I’ve yet to see a film from him that didn’t garner some sense of sheer entertainment and insight. Linklater’s films require attention and demand from his audience, they’re wonderfully written save for a few hitches along the road.

A few nights ago I was finally able to view “A Scanner Darkly,” and I admit I was brutally disappointed. It was faulted in being utterly dull and Keanu Reeves in his usual stone gaze level gave a sleepy performance, but it wasn’t awful. There’s that last scroller before the credits that really hit home.

But for every “The Bad News Bears,” there are three more “Waking Life,” and “Before Sunrise” from Linklater on the way.

Talking to that brilliant bastard would truly make this man’s life worthwhile.

While mental defects with cameras like Eli Roth, and Michael Bay get all the attention, Linklater is still out there providing worthwhile dramas and comedies. So, anyway, here’s a rundown of the films I’ve seen from Mr. Linklater, and some sneaky review insertions just because I’m a snake, and I love lists, and I like to grade shit.

Dazed and Confused (****)
It was said that Linklater spent most of the money for this on the soundtrack, and that was a worthy investment considering the soundtrack is one of the best ever made. Not since “Saturday Night Fever” has one genre of music clashed so naturally. Classic rock galore. “Dazed and Confused” is a pure masterpiece and an unofficial take off from “American Graffiti” chronicling the last night of a group of high schoolers before summer. All the typical Linklater regulars can be found here Adam Goldberg, Matthew McConaughey, and Jason London.

“Dazed and Confused” has some of the most memorable scenes in modern film from the paddling sequence set to “No More Mr. Nice Guy,” to the party at the moon tower, and what would a film from the man be without your usual great dialogue? The soundtrack is the key here though, and every bit of it works in the film’s favor. I dig almost everything from the sixties and seventies, and this is a must see.

Before Sunrise, Before Sunset (****)
I think many would agree these films are just two of the best romances ever written. I was originally very skittish for the sequel, but Linklater just didn’t disappoint. You can watch them in sequence, and or you can watch them separately and none of the effect is lost. Where “Before Sunrise” was the coincidental meeting of two people traveling abroad and getting lost, the sequel brings us forward to re-unite where they lost contact and eventually met up yet again by coincidence.

The optimist is the cynic, and the cynic now the optimist thanks to life. Linklater never forces melodrama or cheesy exchanges between the two, he just sets them down on the Parisian landscaper where Jesse and Celine discuss where their lives have led them, and discover they’re meant to be together. Now they just have to see if life allows them that desire. Where as “Sunrise” left us wondering about their meeting, “Sunset” answers the questions, while leaving us in suspense yet again; Linklater craftily ends the film on a rather crucial scene. What about the book tour? Will Jesse sacrifice his true love for his son? Did Jesse ever make it to the train? One wonders. Two of the most underrated romances ever made.

SubUrbia (**)
A few people who saw this said Linklater perfectly reflected the pointless efforts of small towners looking to break free from their surroundings, and fight the inevitable. But I just couldn’t find anything interesting in this. From the bland melodrama, the cheesy murder mystery halfway in, or the sense of futility, I just couldn’t enjoy this as much as Linklater’s other films. Granted, there are very good performances, but this is one of his weaker entries.

The Newton Boys (**)
Much more mainstream this time around, his bank robbery heist film based on a true story is yet another weak drama with the back drop of action behind the story of the three brothers. With McConaughey half assing it, Hawke playing second banana, and Skeet Ulrich in a barely memorable performance, “The Newton Boys” escapes from most of my collective memory. It’s surely not a film that sticks with you.

Waking Life (****)
This is a film I’ve seen perhaps ten times, and I always manage to pick up something new from it. I was originally attracted to it by Linklater’s name, and was rather stunned to discover it was animated. Then I was equally taken aback to learn it has zero plot. It’s basically a philosophical existentialist fantasy about a young boy drifting in and out of different dream sequences. No matter how hard he tries, he just can’t wake up, and he eventually bumps into one or more folks and engages in utterly engrossing and rather elaborate conversations about life, and the state of being. Look out for the cameos by Nicky Katt, Adam Goldberg, and Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy who reprise their roles as Jesse and Celine. This is brain candy, pure and simple.

Tape (****)
This is yet another simplistic drama set to Linklater’s usual verbose style. Like a stage play, the entire film takes place in a seedy motel room, where Ethan Hawke, and Robert Sean Leonard discuss their past, their current gripes with life, and the foggy details of the rape of a girl from their school. Uma Thurman appears in the utterly hectic climax where she enlists her own form of assurance on the two who can’t decide if they raped her or not. Gritty direction, improv, and brilliant dialogue, all Linklater in a nutshell.

School of Rock (****)
Linklater’s mainstream outing is a kick ass piece of family comedy with the typical story of a teacher changing the lives of a group of kids, but as usual, Linklater just doesn’t serve up rehashed crap, even in the confines of a kids film. There are no cutesy characters, no cheesy dialogue, no sentimental sub-plots, and the kids are just kids. And then there are the gold nuggets. Classic rock score: check, homage after homage to classic rock giants: check, and of course there’s the mostly improvised performance by Jack Black as a wannabe rocker who trains a bunch of kids to form a band to compete in a Battle of the Bands contest which all builds up to the fantastic climax where they rock to the awfully catchy “Teacher’s Pet.” Black is in rare form here, and this is a movie with replay value up the ass.

A Scanner Darkly (** 1/2)
My viewings of “The Bad News Bears,” and “Fast Food Nation” pending, “A Scanner Darkly” was just an utter disappointment for me. After all the anticipation, the waiting, and the suspense, this resulted in a mostly dull science fiction yarn set to a modern drug ridden society. While the animation is eye catching, and performances by Downey and Cochrane are memorable, the film is steeped in mostly drab characterization, and a crime sub-plot that went nowhere. However, there is the final scroller. As someone who grew up around the drug environment with many family and friends taken by the addiction, it’s a gut wrenching end to an otherwise sub-par effort. No one is more disappointed than I am.

But through the good and bad, Linklater is just an artist. Every film he gives American movie-goers ensures a memorable piece of work, and I’m just a fan. He gets put on the grill often by folks who claim he’s too verbose and heavy handed, but I was attracted to his films because of it. He doesn’t ramble. Every piece of dialogue matter, every piece of dialogue serves some sense of importance, and I’ll be awaiting my chance to check out his last two offerings. My hat’s off to you, dude.

As for the interview with Linklater… well, one can have his pipe dreams, can’t he?

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Remember when Dave Chapelle chickened out of a great deal with Comedy Central? I do. I didn’t write about it at the time because I didn’t care. His show was kind of funny, — hell some of the skits were brilliant — but I didn’t care one way or the other about the fate of his show. I had opinions on the whole “he’s crazy/he’s not crazy/he’s coming back/he’s not coming back” business, but I kept them to myself for the most part. That all changed the other day when a clueless mouth breather said, “You know, that Chapelle guy has a lot of integrity. It took some guts to do what he did. Not everyone could walk away from that much money.”

First of all, he didn’t walk. He ran. There was no integrity, either, and it took no guts. It was a coward’s way out.

Had Chapelle been merely a “regular” comedian who wasn’t getting the kind of attention he was, and had he been offered a contract for a “reasonable” amount of money, there would be no discussion. Instead, Chapelle was in the public eye with a super hot show and the kind of contract that would cause most comedians to kill their own mothers. Had he walked away from that because he didn’t want the money, that would’ve been gutsy. Instead, however, he caved to pressure, and it is understandable (though not the least bit respectable).

The pressure must have been huge; besides having a show loved by millions, there was the bounty hanging over his head courtesy of Comedy Central (and if any network is giving you that much money it is not a pay check, it’s a bounty). That kind of pressure must make it hard to create, too, but guess what? That’s his fucking job. He made the beast that brought him those riches — to suddenly say he can’t perform under such pressure is not only chickenshit, it’s bullshit. Sure, critics may have panned the series’ return, but fans don’t listen to critics too often. Had Chapelle and crew kept on the same course, they would’ve made the fans happy and kept them laughing. Instead, Chapelle spit in the collective face of those people. What made it worse is that he continued to put out a DVD of the unfinished third season, did a movie, and continues to do stand up. What does that say? If he can’t be funny for millions, how do you think he’s going to perform in some comedy club with a $20 cover charge? Seems sort of like a let down, doesn’t it?

Chapelle’s disappearance sparked a lot of discussion. He was accused of everything from being a crack head to doing some kind of spiritual retreat in Africa (or a combination of both), but most people agreed he had lost it. Then he came back and said the pressure was too much and he proved he lost it. People would’ve had more sympathy if he was strung out, but no. He simply got stressed like millions of other Americans do on a daily basis when their jobs get to be a little too much. Of course, when some guy quits because of that, his actions usually only hurt his family. They don’t hurt production crews, network employees or fans.

When Chapelle pulled that little stunt it made him smaller in the eyes of many people, including a good number of his fans (as witnessed by those third season DVD sales). The real tragedy, though, is that Chapelle was worth that money. He brought big ratings to the network, and his DVD sales were excellent until he pissed his pants in the most public way. His contract didn’t seem any more out of line than those given to sports stars. Instead of letting ratings and critics prove he couldn’t deliver the goods, though, he did it himself. Why anyone would do that is beyond me. You’re an artist (and yes, I believe comedians are artists), you create. If the money affects you, you aren’t an artist, you’re an entertainer. And if it still affects you, you aren’t an entertainer, you’re a spineless hack who had only been pretending to have talent. I know that’s not the case with Chapelle, but that’s sure as hell what it looks like.

It took no guts to do what he did. It involved no integrity. He was a deer in the headlights and he bolted. What would a real artist have done? Attacked the damn car and left everyone for dead, that’s what. How you face challenges says a lot about you. How you don’t face them says even more. So what do Chapelle’s actions say about him?

Nothing, but only because nobody cares to listen anymore.

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The news came my way Thanksgiving weekend, a weekend already filled with plenty of stress and hand wringing due to a move into a new home whilst battling a couple of different illnesses. During times like these, all a guy wants is a little good news, ya know? But this wouldn’t come to be. No, I received the news that Erik Jambor would be resigning as Festival Director of the Sidewalk Moving Picture Festival in Birmingham, Alabama. Shockingly bad news. Regular readers of Film Threat have no doubt seen my Sidewalk ramblings over the past few years where I served as a festival juror and documented my festival experiences with a lot of naughty language. You will also know that this is my favorite film festival event all year and that I regard many of the Sidewalk staff members as family. This being the case, I took the news hard and was understandably pissed off. Yes, I instantly became concerned about the future of Sidewalk, but mostly I was upset that my dear friend felt he needed to leave behind this amazing event that he helped create and nurture for the past nine years because of some “organizational changes” implemented by the Sidewalk board of directors. Sidewalk was Erik’s lifeblood. Well, to me it appeared to be his lifeblood. I dunno, maybe he has a kickass nudie mag collection that’s nearer and dearer to his heart…but I doubt it. Sidewalk was Erik’s heart and his passion helped inspire an entire filmmaking community in Birmingham, as well as many other filmmakers worldwide. I’m proud to know a person like him and am deeply saddened that things had to come to this. And I’m not alone.

About a week later, once Erik made his official statement that he would be resigning from Sidewalk, anger and sadness poured in from all sides, mostly the Birmingham filmmaking community. Many insist – NO JAMBOR, NO PEACE. At first, I agreed with them. Being that a huge chunk of the festival’s heart and soul just walked out the door, it was logical to think that we had reached the end of the Sidewalk. But a couple of weeks have gone by and I’ve thought back quite a bit on my adventures in Birmingham. And you know what I remember the most? It’s all of the different people who would come up and introduce themselves, whether they be local filmmaker, festival staff member, volunteer, or movie lover, and all of them not in the least bit shy about telling me how much the festival means to them and Birmingham. It would happen all weekend long and I never grew tired of hearing it. Sidewalk was born of Erik Jambor’s passion and is been kept alive for nearly nine years by this amazing community of people with their overwhelming pool of talent, local pride and undying love of film. These people are the Sidewalk Moving Picture Festival and with a passion like theirs, the Sidewalk will never die.

An end of an era has been reached and it’s a shame that it had to end like this, but change isn’t only inevitable, it’s also healthy, even though things may seem scary at first. But rest assured, good things are on their way - for the people directly affected by this change, for Sidewalk and for the Birmingham filmmaking and movie loving community. The show must go on and Birmingham will make sure that it does. Erik should be proud.

Long live Sidewalk.

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Hey Gang-

As strange as it seems, I get interviewed a lot for stories about the film industry. Here’s a link to an audio interview I did with Indie Film Nation.
A blog called Random Interviews did one with me, and it was kind of fun.

G4 did this piece awhile back when I first began doing my DVDuesday segment.

And, for your own amusement, you can mess with me by putting words right in my mouth. This site Fylmz saw fit to include me in a slew of people you can mock by adding your own words.

So, have fun with that. I’ll post the best ones and I’ll even pick one winner who will get a special prize like, um, well, a DVD or a T-shirt or both, I haven’t quite worked it out. The better the Gore Fylmz, so to speak, the cooler the prizes.

Man, that’s like, too much Gore if you ask me. Now, even I’m sick of me.
Okay… that’s all for now.

Gore gone!

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Hey Gang-

I know I’ve mentioned it before, but I write this weekly column that you can only read on SuicideGirls.com and if you’re not reading it, you’re missing cool stuff. You don’t need a subscription to the site to read the news, so stop by. If you’ve been reading it every week, you would have caught my columns and learned all about–

Movie Genres Redux
Top Turkeys of 2006
Who Needs Actors?
Borat Movie-Film Make Me Thinks Deep Thought About Comedy Film
Walk Like a Zombie
10 Dick Flicks for a Delightful Evening
Film Festival Road Trips worth the Gas
Death at the Movies

…along with a host of other odd film-related topics.

And if you do become of a member of the SuicideGirls.com web site, you can comment on my stories and maybe even check out the other goodies the site has to offer.

Okay, enough with the plugs… just read it, you’ll dig it.
Gore gone!

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Over the November 18 weekend Film Threat was all over the news for its Frigid 50 list. You may have seen the CNN story or read the AP piece. Mel Gibson was mentioned in each, and it seemed like all the stories were taking the list very seriously. I did not take part in this year’s festivities mainly due to time constraints and the fact that my column does this sort of thing almost every week, so it seemed a bit redundant. That didn’t stop family and friends from questioning me about it, however.

“Why did you make fun of Gibson?” “Why must you pick on someone when they are down?” “You were on CNN. How does that feel?”

First of all, I didn’t make fun of Gibson on that list. I had done a column soon after his drunk rant was made public. I also was not “on” CNN. The site I write for was mentioned. There’s a big difference. If I’m ever mentioned by name on CNN it will probably be followed by something like, “… and he says he won’t be taken alive.” That’s my destiny. I accept it.

Some friends found the entire thing pretty funny. Far too many others were either offended or took it way too seriously. (One even told me that since the list came out, Gibson’s career was finished. We don’t have that much power here at Film Threat, though we did destroy Cuba Gooding, Jr. a few years ago.) I personally found their reactions far funnier than the list. I know Film Threat is considered one of the top five movie sites in the world, but this was a little too much.

One thing that Film Threat does, besides championing independent film far better than any other site, is really remind Hollywood of what doesn’t fucking matter. And one of those things is celebrity culture. In the grand scheme of things celebrity culture means absolutely nothing, though it is good for comic fodder and little else. Unfortunately, there are far too many people who forgot that celebrity means nothing. Celebrity is like lice. It’s annoying and hard to get rid of without the proper comb.

Film Threat has always stuck it to Hollywood in one way or another. This list is just another way of saying we care so much about film that we aren’t letting these idiots spoil it with their childish antics and self-indulgent mayhem. Of course, the big problem with doing that is that some people won’t get it and we’ll look like we’re bullies.

I’m here to say we aren’t bullies. We’re the gatekeepers of sanity.

We live in a world where there is a show called “House of Carters.” We live in a world where Tom Cruise calls Matt Lauer “glib” and takes a bride who is old enough to be his daughter, and we’re told we’re supposed to care. We live in a world where O.J. Simpson, an ex-football player/B-list movie star, who may or may not have killed his ex-wife and a waiter, claims innocence in said crimes yet tries to push a book where he surmises how he may have killed them. We live in a world where Sean Penn can play a mentally disabled man and win all kinds of accolades for it, but put a man in blackface and see how warmly that’s received. We live in a world where Russell Crowe can assault someone with a phone and then say that maybe our justice system blows things out of proportion — and makes this observation while telling us that we should see his movies since we’ll know they’ll be good simply because he stars in them. We live in a world where you can drive drunk and rage against the Jews, and it’s the racism and not the fact that Gibson could’ve killed someone that causes outrage. We live in a world where Paris Hilton is famous for being filmed having sex and carrying around a small dog (not at the same time). We live in a world where Lindsay Lohan is more well known than Ward Churchill. We live in a world where people actually pay attention to people pretending to be something called “Fashion Police.”

And shouldn’t all of this be shot down like a meth addict storming the White House’s doors?

Yes, and that’s what we’re here for. I thank CNN and AP for helping get the word out.

And I pity the people who didn’t understand it, though Gibson is probably thanking you … as long as you aren’t Jewish.

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Hey Gang-

As promised, we did a little pilot, kind of a trial run for a new Attack of the Show segment that would be a web-exclusive each week on the G4 TV web site. If you like it, we’ll make more. It’s called DVDuesday: Extended Cut and it allows me to cover DVDs that I didn’t have time for in my regular segment. Considering that nearly 300 new DVDs are released every Tuesday, I could do this segment for hours!

Anyway, here’s a link to the first one. Hope you dig it.

Gore gone!

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