I CAN BE YOUR DIRTY LITTLE…

I CAN BE YOUR DIRTY LITTLE…

I like to read about upcoming films and see pretty on-set pictures of the goings-on during the shooting period. I like it a lot. Please don’t confuse my love for knowledging (I don’t think that’s a word but it is today) myself with upcoming film information, like the actions that take place during a shoot, with filling my head with stupid internet spoilage. That’s just stupid.

I’ve been noticing a lot of “on-set” coverage lately being thrown all about the internet. Even a lot of junket coverage where a studio where invite a member of the “press” to a certain location to cover a shoot (by gathering interviews and sometimes taking pictures).

I read something recently on the internet which kind of inspired me to have a new goal in life. I read a story by Eric D. Snider (of EFilm Critic, Hollywood Bitch Slap, and whatever other variation of the site there is, as well as his own site, Ericdsnider.com) about this one time where he played a “junket whore” as he called it. Apparently a studio hooked him up with a plane ticket to fly to some various state to cover the release of some film.

In the end, the studio spent about $1,100 dollars on him, between flight, hotel and eating cash, just to do some interviews and give them some positive press. Resulting from his article about being a “junket whore” (he included a lot more in his story, I am just using the money information to further my new-found inspiration), the studio dropped him (as well as some other studios) from their press screening lists. Small price to pay I guess. But I have an announcement to make…

I’m not sure if any important member of any studio, or even some hip director, will ever read this to hear my plea but if you out there and you’re reading this, please take future notice.

I, Michael Ferraro, writer for Film Threat and various other publications throughout my crappy city (Orlando), will be have no problem covering dumb little filler interviews to help promote whatever film is coming out. I like to drink a lot but I’m not an alcoholic. I like to take lots of pictures and impress my friends with all the celebrities I meet. But most of all, above all things, I like money.

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FT scribe Michael Ferraro really likes to bowl.

Times is tough these days, son. Gas prices have increased insanely, cost of living keeps going up as some mentally challenged business men think condo living is sweet butter, and the other bills still aren’t going away. So I really like money. Whoever said money doesn’t mean anything is probably the same mentally challenged individual that turns anything he can find into a condo.

I’d have no problem making time to fly out somewhere to interview people. And I am sure my publication(s) would appreciate the coverage and attention. If you’re giving me coin, I won’t say anything negative. If I see the film you’re promoting and it sucks like Spider-man, I just won’t review it. Not very hard. It’d be fun.

So next time you need a wingman, call me up. I’m easy to get a hold of. I’ll work hard for the money. I have before anyway.




Posted on August 15, 2006 in Blogs by
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One Comment on "I CAN BE YOUR DIRTY LITTLE…"

  1. Gigi on Thu, 17th Aug 2006 11:08 pm 

    Sheeiiiittt. You wouldn’t believe what **I** would do for a buck now.


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