And USA's new president is........??*?

[Kuato]

if anyone. who would it be?

i say it should be Micheal Jackson because no one would see that coming
@#@&!!!

[Rory L. Aronsky]

History shall be made when Ellen M becomes the first female President of the United States and Skanky, former Quizno's spokesrodent, becomes the vice-president. During her 43-year term (made possibly by changes in the Constitution that, above all things, bars a haggard Janet Jackson from taking ANYTHING off), Ellen will always be wary of Skanky, who eyes her warily, as if he has plans to kill her and take over the Presidency.

However, Skanky will have to resign due to a scandal involving banana pudding, a vibrator, chocolate syrup, and paprika. Thanks to the new technology first started by Matt Groening, Richard Nixon's head will be the new Vice President.

[Kuato]

or mabye it should be gary oldman in his role as a midget in Tip Toe - dressed - in a wonder woman tight suit.

saucy

[Furious D]

Originally posted by Rory L. Aronsky
History shall be made when Ellen M becomes the first female President of the United States and Skanky, former Quizno's spokesrodent, becomes the vice-president. During her 43-year term (made possibly by changes in the Constitution that, above all things, bars a haggard Janet Jackson from taking ANYTHING off), Ellen will always be wary of Skanky, who eyes her warily, as if he has plans to kill her and take over the Presidency.

However, Skanky will have to resign due to a scandal involving banana pudding, a vibrator, chocolate syrup, and paprika. Thanks to the new technology first started by Matt Groening, Richard Nixon's head will be the new Vice President.

Sounds like a PSYCHIC FLASH!:eek:

Nixon's head will be assasinated while touring Dealey Plaza in Dallas. Witnesses describe the suspect as a strange looking rodent with chemically manipulated genitalia and what looks like grilled fur and teeth marks. Police chase the suspect, but he escapes by diving into a toilet and swimming away. A note left at the scene reads: YOU CAN'T KEEP STINKY DOWN. Police will be baffled, and Secretary of State Bruce Campbell's made the new VP in a ceremony on Air Force 1.

Skanky marries Charlize Theron and becomes the new spokesrodent for Hershey's Syrup.

[Kuato]

or mabye it should be mel gibson? i think he'd prolly go for it... then we'd all be eating vanilla waiffers and drinking blood

[Rory L. Aronsky]

Reminds me of a scene in the very first Family Guy episode where Peter begs Lois to let him go to a stag party and they go through all the times that he's consumed alcohol and there's a flashback to a church scene where Peter is kneeling and drinking wine:

Peter - "Is that really the blood of Christ?"
Priest - "Yes"
Peter - "Wow, that guy must have been wasted 24 hours a day!"

[Kuato]

hey louis...

diareha.. HhaahHahHaa

peter!....i'm holdin ice tea!

[The Baron]

Although I usually back Cthulhu for President, after careful consideration of the candidates, I think that I should be the next Commander and Chief.

My first act as President would probably be to get assassinated, but before that, my party, (the Wild Party,) would convert the system over to duplicate the Dutch government: legalized, regulated and taxed prostitution and soft drugs. I'll convert the White House into a hash bar, and Congress into the National Brothel. (Oh, what a minute. Congress already is a whorehouse!)

My campaign slogans: "What deficit, Baby?" "Go ahead and spend. We'll print more."

My inaugural address would probably start out with the question, "Dude, where did I park Airforce One?"

A vote for The Baron is a vote for... uh... THE BARON! Yeah, that's it.

I'll put Furious D in my cabinet as Minister of Propaganda, and Ellen can be Secretary of Perktacularness. Rory can be in charge of the National School Lunch Program, instituting "Rat-On-A-Stick" as a new food group. Other cabinet positions are open to the highest bidder.

Yeah, I'd rock as President. And I'd be smart enough to avoid parades in Texas.

[Furious D]

Originally posted by The Baron
I'll put Furious D in my cabinet as Minister of Propaganda.

I also want to be Secretary of Defence with the license to bomb the piss out of anybody who looks at me cock-eyed.;)

And after I bomb them beyond the stone age, I'll blame it on France.:D

[El Duderino Diablo]

So long as none of it interferes with my plans on becoming Warlord of Canadaland. I have some smiting to do beginning with the BC provincial gov't. after that I intend on running roughshod over Quebec and Ontario and making an example of any who dare defy me.
Pike a premiere's head and watch those bloodsuckers curl up into the fetal position and beg for their fat mammies!

[The Baron]

Originally posted by Furious D
I also want to be Secretary of Defence with the license to bomb the piss out of anybody who looks at me cock-eyed.;)

And after I bomb them beyond the stone age, I'll blame it on France.:D

That's all part of the plan of the N.P.W.W.O. (New Pole Weasel World Order.)

You do still have all those weapons of mass destruction in your basement, right? The ones Saddam asked you to hold onto?

NOVUS ORDO WEASELORUM

[Furious D]

Originally posted by The Baron
You do still have all those weapons of mass destruction in your basement, right? The ones Saddam asked you to hold onto?
NOVUS ORDO WEASELORUM

They're starting to leak and stink up the basement, and all the neighbourhood pets are now bald. But on the plus size it's seems to have revived Stinky, the now zombified Quizno's rodent, after his grilling incident. He's not singing anymore, just wandering around the house muttering: "brains...brains...."

Ellen will be happy about that. ;)

NOVUS ORDO WEASOLORUM:cool:

[Rory L. Aronsky]

You mean PRESIDENT Ellen. Show the respect that your evil psychic powers gave you!

[The Baron]

Don't you have rodents to barbeque?

[Rory L. Aronsky]

Eh, not anymore. It kinda bores me and besides, my new personal hero is Hannibal Lecter.....................

[Ellen M.]

Originally posted by Rory L. Aronsky You mean PRESIDENT Ellen. Show the respect that your evil psychic powers gave you!

Okay, okay, I may be a perktacular goddess, willing to kick Paris Hilton's bony ass in a naked chocolate syrup wresting match, but there are 2 things I am not... insane & egotistical! Those are the top qualities one must have to run for President of the United States (just ask Hillary Clinton). Besides, I'd never get the Christian majority vote, once they dug through my checkered past & figured out that I had a bat mitzvah! While I'm very flattered that you guys would actually consider me for this role, I must defer to my ex-husband Stinky & say, "Nooooooooooooooooo"!

I say RALPH NADER for President (kidding)!
Ellen ;)

[Furious D]

Originally posted by Ellen M.
Besides, I'd never get the Christian majority vote, once they dug through my checkered past & figured out that I had a bat mitzvah!

Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't a bat mitzvah a vampire who keeps kosher? ;)

Is it me or do our little flights of fancy show the makings of the next FT Forums Script. Not Piranha Gun 3, but NOT THE WEST WING, a soap opera about the most screwed up White House since Rutherford B. Hayes.

We could have President Baron, VP Ellen, I could be Secretary in Charge of Kickin Ass & Takin names, The Dude can be Warlord of neighbouring Canada, Stinky can be the official White House zombie rodent, and there can liberal nukings, chocolate syrup wrestling and wacky hijinks at Presbyterian Prayer Breakfasts.

It's a thought.:cool:

[The Baron]

Actually, I was thinking about starting a new screenplay entitled MANDINGO 3000. It's a blaxploitation film set in the year 3000, but done in 70s style, with a fashion sense that reflects what low budget filmmakers would have envisioned for the future (metallic silver bellbottom pants and platform shoes, helmet-like afros, etc.) The soundtrack would have to be futuristic funk ala George Clinton and Bootsy Collins.

[Kuato]

i think you guys need to go have group sex and be over it ahhaha

mabye Nick Nolte 4 president - he could get the job done

[Rory L. Aronsky]

but NOT THE WEST WING, a soap opera about the most screwed up White House since Rutherford B. Hayes.

This is something to consider, Furious. I'm sure it would be better than the actual West Wing on TV right now as quality has declined on that show during the 5th season, ever since John Wells took full control of the show.

However, if the administration for "Not the West Wing" is going to be set up like this, I want to be the press secretary...the vigilante fending off the hungry media with a baseball bat and a trademark quote, "YOU AIN'T GETTIN' ANYTHING OUTTA ME!!", followed by canned applause.

[GiGi]

I finally saw those Quizno ads guys....very disturbing. Looked like a mashed rat was bred with a Mr. Pototo head. What in the hell? Makes me think that's what is in their meat. Ill stick to subway...

[The Baron]

Originally posted by Kuato
i think you guys need to go have group sex and be over it ahhaha

That would be quite a feat, considering how far away from one another we all live. But please, feel free to throw in a new set of batteries and fantasize away. ;)

(P.S.: Keep it set on "low," so you don't chip your teeth.) :p

[Furious D]

Whose to say we can't do both when it comes to Mandingo 3000 and Not The West Wing. I think this forum is big enough for the both of them. :D

Plus, think of the crossover potential. Mandingo 3000 could travel back in time to meet the new President, and Brian Borman & his Piranha Gun could be his new Secret Service bodyguard. It could be like those stupid TV shows where the Flintstones meet the Jetsons or Simon & Simon got to Hawaii to meet Magnum PI.

As for the whole group sex thing suggested by Kuato. Well, I don't think we actually have time between running the country and organising the first world naked chocolate syrup wrestling championships. We're hoping to make it into the Athens Olympics.:rolleyes:

[Ellen M.]

I say go for it Furious D, but we have to call it "The Left Wing"!
Just make sure I get most of the good lines!

Oops, I chipped my tooth (this is what happens when I log in from home)!
KIDDING!

Ellen ;)

[The Baron]

Originally posted by Ellen M.
Oops, I chipped my tooth (this is what happens when I log in from home)!
KIDDING!

Nope. Not gonna do it. It would be too easy.