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  "What would you be willing to trade for the flying car?"  
 
     
THE FLYING CAR
by Kevin Carr
2002, Un-rated, 6 minutes, View Askew Productions
They’re back. Dante and Randal, our beloved clerks from Kevin Smith’s films, finally have their own movie again. Sure, it’s a short film, but I’ll bet this six-minute ditty cost as much – if not more – than the original Clerks did.

Kevin Smith, a regular guest on "The Tonight Show" with his "Roadside Attractions" bits, directed this short film for television to reprise the characters that made him famous. Notably missing are the other characters that made him famous – Jay and Silent Bob – and this is actually refreshing. It reminds us that Smith’s gift in writing is for dialogue and not just the foul-mouthed yammering of Jay Phat Budz.

Also missing from this short is the notorious profanity that is constantly getting Smith in trouble with the censors and the studios. (Remember, this film was commissioned for "The Tonight Show." We’ve got my grandmother watching, fer Christ’s sake.) Another testament to Smith’s writing ability is that he keeps the witty banter between Dante and Randal fresh without even a single "fuck," "cock" or weed reference. It gives us hope for his post-Jay-and-Silent-Bob films.

"The Flying Car" takes place is a stationary car as Dante and Randal are stuck in a traffic jam. Randal starts daydreaming out loud how great it would be if they had a flying car, like in the "Jetsons" cartoon. Dante is dragged into the conversation and eventually is posed with the question, "What would you be willing to trade for the flying car?"

Of course, Dante bites, and Randal leads him along by his nose through a wacky scenario about a crazy homosexual German scientist with a foot fetish who will trade his flying car prototype for Dante’s severed foot (and a little diddling while he’s under the anesthetic). All of this leads to a telegraphed (yet not unfunny) punch line that will remind any die-hard Clerks fan about Dante and Randal’s conversation on their way to the funeral in the first film.

If you thought Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back blew because there wasn’t enough of the Quick Stop, or if you loved all six episodes of the "Clerks: The Animated Series," you’ll love this throw-back to the original chemistry that put View Askew on the map.



 
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