TURKISH EXORCIST (Seytan)

3 Stars
Year Released: 1974
MPAA Rating: Unrated
Running Time: 100 minutes
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Damn, they weren’t kidding messing around with this film! Out of all the Turkish rip-off movies I’ve seen, this one is the most shameless. Being that this film is about twenty minutes shorter than William Friedkin’s classic, there’re a few things missing, but other than that, “Seytan” is a damn near shot-by-shot copycat of the original. You’d think Gus Van Sant was behind this one.
“Seytan” uses the same exact set-up as the “Exorcist” — a young girl, living with her well-to-do mother, becomes possessed by Satan after tooling around on a ouija board. There’s also the Father Karras character who witnesses the girl’s possession. In “Seytan” he also has the ailing mother. And there’s the Father Merrin character who comes to try and save the day.
“Seytan” copies all of the sequences, with the girl freaking out on her bed as she’s under the power of Satan. There’s the head turning thing, the spitting thing, the message written across her abdomen thing and even the scene where she comes downstairs to pee herself to the dismay of her mother and her guests.
Some of the shots are even exactly the same and the house they use as the setting for most of the film looks pretty much like the one in “The Exorcist.” They even found a long staircase for the Father Karras character to go tumbling down at the end.
I’m not into fast-forwarding through films, especially if I’m scrutinizing them for the purpose of a review. Every film out there deserves a fair look. But I just couldn’t do it with this one. Imagine watching the real “Exorcist,” but in a language that you can’t understand. Boring as all hell, right? You bet. So, about mid-way through “Seytan,” I had to start forwarding through the talking scenes to all the good stuff…if you wanna call it good stuff.
Mostly the only reason anybody would want to see this film is to laugh at what a shameless rip-off it is. But if that’s not enough, I would like to bring you…
The Top 5 Reasons To Watch “Turkish Exorcist”
5) During the scene when the little girl is going through a series of tests to find out what’s wrong with her, she’s hooked up to some sort of device that looks like there’s two jackhammers slamming her on either side of the head, while her mouth is stuffed with tissue. If that’s not funny enough, the face she’s making is priceless.
4) During the bouncing bed scene where the mother finds her daughter bouncing around uncontrollably on her bed, it’s pretty obvious that there’s a bunch of people underneath the bed, pushing with all they got to bounce the little girl around. After screaming for a while, the mother then piles on top of the girl, so that both of them get bounced around for a bit.
3) The green vomit scene has been replaced by a simple mustard spitting. The filmmakers must’ve said, “Well, we really shouldn’t use split pea soup because that would be too much like ‘The Exorcist.’”
2) The little girl’s satanic voice sounds like a drunken old pirate. More funny than scary.
1) The best shot-to-the-balls scene ever filmed! While being examined at home, the little girl strikes out and punches the doctor square in the nuts. What follows is a hilarious reaction as the doc goes to the floor, screaming in pain. This scene makes the whole thing worthwhile.
Yeah, it’s a virtual remake, but obviously this film doesn’t even touch the real “Exorcist.” The production values aren’t there, nor is the blood, sweat and tears that were poured into Friedkin’s film that make it such a marvel. “Seytan” is just some goofy shit that’s best watched with a bunch of drunken friends.



Posted on June 6, 2006 in Reviews by
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