THE WIDOWER

2 Stars
Year Released: 1999
MPAA Rating: Unrated
Running Time: 78 minutes
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Milton Smythe (Shawn Milsted) is desperately in love with his wife (Ramona Korr) primarily because she orders him to be. So pathetically hen-pecked and deluded is this sniveling worm of a man that he can’t bear to let his wife go. Even after her death in a freak accident, Milt keeps the smelly, decaying corpse around. Wanting only to spend one last anniversary with his dearly departed wife, Milt dresses her up and takes her out for a night on the town where she comes to life for his eyes only.
Not that Milt’s nosy neighbor Mrs. Wutzernaim-Hirsch (Irene Miscisco) isn’t trying to sneak a peek at the odd goings-on across the way. Indeed, she blatantly spies on the even-after-death-we-don’t-part couple, ultimately reporting her neighbor’s strange behavior to the police.
Enter Detective Cliff Rind (Tim Trylinski,) a bumbling, lazy, cynical waste of a police officer, and his even dimmer partner (Darren Andrichuk.) Together, this donut-downing duo chases after Milt and his deceased bride in an ever un-funnier series of wacky escapades and would-be riotous misadventures. A sort of “Rear Window” meets “Weekend at Bernadette’s,” this embarrassingly unhumorous horror-comedy oozes with distaste. It’s bad enough that everything about this film is more cliched than what preceded it. But beyond that, there’s not a single charismatic or even mildly pleasant character in the entire film. Everybody is irritating! The cops and nosy neighbor, I could buy. But Milt is such a sniveling weenie, we wish he was dead. Even his wife manages to annoy from the Beyond.
Director Marcus Rogers proves that he can at least tell a cohesive, if desperately uninspired narrative with “The Widower.” Beyond that, however, one would be advised to bury this overripe, melodramatic mess with Milt’s wife and throw the cops with doughnut jokes on top the coffin for good measure.



Posted on December 18, 2003 in Reviews by
Buffer


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